Wednesday, July 4, 2012

Wishcasting Wednesday: Who Do You Wish to Become?

Taken on my maternal grandparents' farm on a sunny June day in 1957, I looked like a very happy camper. At two and a half, I loved everything about that place... riding the horses, being outdoors, and, most of all, how happy I was. One of those Pollyanna-like kids, I did everything with flair. My paternal grandmother Lucy once lovingly remarked about my happy attitude, " There's Diana... why walk when skipping will do?" (a phrase later applied to my daughter) :)
 

As I grew up, there were a lot of loss, adult responsibilities at too young an age, disappointments, poor choices... all overshadowing the promise I'd had. I set aside my drive and ambition. I was overwhelmed and my happiness became a mask.

T
hen I had children. Two unexpected, wonderful amazing people. Miracles, born after my surgery and treatment. One right on top of the other, less than two years apart. Since their arrival, they have been teaching me that you can be happy, you can dream, you can still be that person you always thought you would be, only better, wiser, more content. I encouraged them to do what they love. Now adults, they drag me right along behind them, throwing me toward MY dreams and preaching my words back to me... never quit; do what you love; it's your turn now Mom.
Their persistence combined with their success has pushed me through the stubbornness, residual pain, and, yes, the unrelenting anger I'd felt that I'd squandered any chance of finding that dream again, that my life took such a turn and I was not brave enough to do any more than hang on. Forgiving others is easy; forgiving oneself is sometimes nearly impossible. But I have. Finally, I can honestly say, I have. 

Jamie Ridler asks this week on Wishcasting Wednesday: Who do you wish to become? I wish for myself to become the wiser embodiment of that innocent me, who knew beyond doubt that anything was possible and that you were allowed... encouraged even... to skip on the way there.

These Wishcasting Wednesday exercises have become a life-changer for me. I take my wishes into the week with me and work on putting them into practice, making them habit. And I take the thoughts of those for whom I am also wishing because their wishes make give me fresh perspective, as well as gratitude for them being on this journey with me, and me with them.


6 comments:

  1. Simply eloquent and beautiful! As you wish for yourself, I so lovingly wish for you as well.

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  2. Simple and beautiful. As you wish for yourself so I wish for you also (with lots of skipping) x

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  3. Diana, your wish this week is so touching. I'll gladly encourage you to skip along the way! As you wish for yourself, so I wish for you also.

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  4. I have had a few moments this week when I witnesses the naive innocent joy of little children and wondered sadly why we can't have that as adults too.

    As you wish for yourself, so I wish for you.

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  5. Yay for your supporting kids!
    As Diana wishes for herself, so I wish for her also.

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  6. Love that "a wiser embodiment of that innocent me..."

    As you wish for yourself, I wish for you as well.

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